Aussie Television - The Worlds Finest
Topic: Travel
Morecambe and Wise, Little and Large, Cannon and Ball, Smith and Jones, Bowers and Hill. All British double acts, for one reason or other, no longer with us. In Chris and Jenny's case, it's because they have fled Sydney, and jetted off to Brisbane, leaving me to fend for myself once more. Anyway, here's what I've been up to in the past couple of days.

*Took a trip to Manly beach with Chris and Jenny on Wednesday. Unfortunately, the shift in the weather to mild drizzle made it seem more like Weston-Super-Mare, only with more in the way of sand.

*After Chris and Jenny's departure on Thursday, journeyed up to the old part of the City, known as the Rocks, which sits at the foot of the Sydney Harbour Bridge. Made a slight fopar involving a group of Irish lads sat outside an Irish Bar, where one of them was commenting how great the place was and how he planned to the stay there the whole time he was in Sydney, in a manner that may or may not have been addressed to me. So totally by accident rather than design, I replied in a thick Ulster accent "Oh yeah, nice one lads!", only for all four of them to turn round and stare straight back at me. Rather than run the risk of any further embarrassing exchanges, I opted to keep on walking, than face such questioning as "So, what part of Ireland are you exactly from then?", "Erm, the English part????"

*Got a dose of Sydney nightlife on Saturday night, with two of my room-mates Chris (half German/half Dutch), and Tiargo (Brasillian), ending up the Home nightclub which included a session from a British Groove Band with a name far too rude to mention here. Suffice to say, I had never heard of them, but they were pretty good.

*Checked out the Power House, which is Sydney's Science and Technology museum, situated in Darling Harbour. The Power House includes an extensive exhibition celebrating the 50th anniversary of Australian Television, which unsurprisingly most of which was totally new to me, bar the odd section such as the Neighbours part where you could watch Scott and Charlene's Wedding sequence, again, and again, and again. They also held a interviewing Australian personalities and industry types from the past and present, including a cast member from 1970s soap opera No 64 (think Crossroads with flimsier sets) who played the role of a psychiatric patient who's illness was she kept taking her clothes off on screen, a Big Brother contestant (go figure), an Australian Idol contestant who entered the competition as both a man and a woman (don't ask), and the bloke who directed Crocodile Dundee and helped set up BSkyB as well as being a major player behind the scenes in Australian Television.

*Darling Harbour itself is one of my favourite parts of the City, including pubs, clubs, restaurants, cafes and museums (the aquarium, the maritime museum, the power house). Think the Bristol Docks, only multiply it by 100 and your still not even close. At night, it also has its fair population of Giant Bats, swooping amongst the trees and lakes.

CDs for under a pound...............
Topic: Travel
Right! That's it, I may as well pack my bags and go home now, as after seeing a record store selling CDs for only $10, surely nothing can top that. We're not just talking your run of the mill artists either, but the majority of names on my CD shopping list. Best of the Ramones? $10! The Rolling Stones 40 Licks? $10! CDs which would usually cost you at least 16 quid back in the UK. $10! That's like 4 quid!

Anyway, did the whole wildlife thing yesterday, what with visiting the Zoo and the Aquarium, both of which are an improvement on Auckland's offering (the aquarium very much so, the zoo only slightly better only because Auckland Zoo was still v.good).

The Zoo itself was accessed by getting a ferry across from the quays area which itself gave a good view of the Sydney Bridge and The Opera House. The Zoo had both Pelicans and Flamingos, which isn't of great note in its way, but if you're Al Pacino then you're going to think they're both one and the same (sorry, watched Scar Face with Greg and Caitlan back in Wellington, and it's been disturbing me ever since the scene where Pacino starts ad-libing to the camera when he spots some flamingos on the television and starts barking "Pellican!" to the camera). There were also some rather sleepy looking koalas, and some chimps who took great pleasure at throwing pieces of turd at the glass window, and then wiping it off and eating it. Well, that was enough to put me off eating for the next hour or so.

The Aquarium was pretty massive and had areas where you could walk down corridors built at the bottom of the tanks, and a massive viewing screen at the end, so it looked like you were in the cinema. Sharks, Sting Rays, and Seals abounded, and there were even a few ducks....

Billie Piper - Big in Katoomba
Topic: Travel
Monday, flew into Sydney, Australia, and convened with Chris and Jen, after yet another fraught session through customs ("Did I pack my suitcase full of soil? No!"), where yet again I got so paranoid with the questioning of bringing food into the country that I found myself declaring my half eaten pack of Polos for the third time.

Made our way over to Katoomba on the Tuesday, home of the Blue Mountains, that includes such things as bush trails, bush trails, and yet more bush trails. The Blue Mountains however do include a Cable Car (as opposed to tram going up a hill that purports to being a cable car in Wellington, when it patently isn't).

It also includes a downwards railway, which goes through a drop that could be described as being almost vertical. This was unexpected at the time, and therefore s*** scary. Chris positioned himself in the carriage first so had a nice metal grate to protect him, then Jenny went in the middle so she was fine, but poor old me was stuck out on the end with only a flimsy metal chain to stop falling out and inflecting serious pain and suffering on my person.

Some other facts about Katoomba and the Blue Mountains:

*They can't get enough of Billie Piper in Katoomba. Oh no! Or Billie;s pop hits from the 1990s it would seem. The former Mrs Evans, and current Mrs Who's "Honey To The Bee" single receives regular rotation in the Blue Mountains cafe

*Katoomba is a popular haunt for school kids on school trips, it would seem. Stalking us everywhere we turned, like the cast of Village Of The Damned.

*It gets cold in Katoomba. They actually get quite a bit of snow fall in July, and to mark the occasion they have an additional Christmas celebration. So, wrap up warm.

*500 piece jigsaws of The Three Sisters are bloody hard to complete. The Three Sisters are a rock formation in the Blue Mountains, which look like three sisters, possibly if squint very hard. Said jigsaw was started by Jenny at 7pm, and subsequently dismantled by an increasingly irate Jenny at 10.30pm.

New Zealand Photo Updates
Topic: Travel
Photos from Wellington now available here.
Photos from the South Island available here.

South Island Quickies
Topic: Travel
Just some quickies today, to get up to date as I'll soon be flying out to meet Chris and Jenny in Sydney, who is feels like have actually been travelling round the world for the past five years.

*Whale Watch on Saturday got cancelled due to over choppy waters, where the chances of anyone being able to hang onto their breakfast would have been null

*Headed to Hamner Springs instead, which rather than being a tour round natural water springs in a volcanic setting, was more akin to a posh spa. Still the sulphur pools were extremely hot at 41 C, and also smelt of egg. I was reliably informed that the Springs were in no way related to the '80s Rap Artist MC Hammer, or the once great British Production house Hammer Horror Films.

*Got up at the extremely early hour of 6am on Sundzy to once again attempt a whale watch session, which surprisingly did run. Waters were extremely choppy, and yes I very nearly did lose my breakfast and in fact didn't feel particularly good for the rest of the day. But we did see various parts of whale anatomy (blow holes, tales, etc). Discovered too late that my camera does in fact have a digitial zoom function, otherwise the photos would have been better.

*Enroute back to Piction, who the the hell do we run into? Only Bloody Becky? Alas, she had briefly made it over to Wellington, only the day before I might add, and was about to get the bus up to Christchurch where she was about to endure a two day flight back to the UK with only a limited stopover in Singapore, as she was skint

*Just Greg and myself on the ferry back to Wellington on Sunday evening as Caitlan had opted to stay on and explore the South Island some more for a further week, as she wasn't starting work for a while longer

*I appear to have mislaid several pairs of pants on my journey so far. I suspect the first lot might have gone during the flight from the US to NZ, but its getting to the stage where I think I'm going to have to purchase some more, as I haven't had time to do anymore washing, and well......

*Completely off topic, but I'm gladded to see that Spurs bottled it at West Ham on the last day of the season, meaning Arsenal claim fourth spot and the final place in next seasons Champions League. Which of course means we don't have to do something crazy like beat Barca in the final to be in next year (though the morale boast might do us some good after all).

Five Go Mad In Picton*
Topic: Travel
On Thursday we took what should have been a routine 3 hour ferry crossing to New Zealand's South Island, only this became more of a 6 hour crossing, after an unknown altercation on board, which meant we had to sail back into Wellington, whereby one of the crew members had to be rushed to Hospital from the port.

Fortunately, we eventually docked in the Port of Picton, on the South Island, where we were greeted by Becky, Greg and Caitlan's former neighbour in Wellington. Becky had been holed up in Picton for the last three months, and had actually been trying to leave for the past week as her visa was about to expire, meaning she would be due to fly back home to England the following Monday. As we discovered, Picton was a very difficult place to escape from, as this I felt was the real New Zealand. A place where everyone knew who you are, and what you'd been up to. Also, the village saying was, "no one's your cousin after dark", which kinda summed it up really.

In the evening we headed for Becky's local, an Irish pub, going by the name of Seumuss - Traditional Irish Hook, run by Alistair and Liz Hawthorne, hailing from Ulster. Here we discovered was the real hub of the town, and much drunken revellery ensued. Tradition has that new people to the town had to perform an Irish Jig on the barrell set up in the middle of the pub, so of course I couldn't refuse the offer (I believe there were photos taken of the incident, fortunately not on on my camera, so they won't be appearing anywhere near this website in the near future).

One anomolly about Picton was the existence of the space age toilet, similar to Supa-Loo, only it actually gave you a time limit of 10 minutes to go about your business before the door opened automatically and thrust you back into the street, regardless of whether you had finished what you were doing or not. It also pipped in Boogie-Woogie style piano music, so it was almost like you having Jools Holland performing the loo while you went about your business.

The four of us stayed in the Sequoia lodge for the night, and the following morning I made a solemn vow never to drink adin, well not until Australia at any rate. The next day we got treated to tea and coco pops in bed (after much pursuding of Becky, I might add). From there we convened to one of the local cafe's for further sustanence (I had hot/pancakes, as has become the tradition on the jaunt round the world), and tossed bits of food to the waiting seagulls. As we left for the bay we heard an almighty crash, as about a dozen gulls descended on the table to pick over any left overs. We sat for sometime skimming stones, until it was time to make a move for Kaikoura, our next port of call.

Greg hired a car and drove it back to the hostel, following Becky in hers, leaving me and Caitlan to try and negotiaite our way back to the hostel on two decrepit bikes from the hostel, which is probably one of the most terrifying things I have ever experienced as having not ridden a bike for almost a decade, there was a very real danger of falling off, or riding headlong into the oncoming traffic, which it being Picton wasn't particularlly heavy, but there was still a real enough danger that I could have done myself an injury, We also got lost several times, and at one point we were greeted by the sound of air raid sirens, bringing forth images of the London Blitz. It however later transpired that we weren't being bombed by the Luftwaffe, and this was actually the siren call to Picton's fire service which works on a part time basis, as there'd been a road smash on the outskirts of the town.

We bade Picton and Becky farwell around 4pm, and headed off for Kaikoura (still don't know if she made it back to her planned destination of Wellington that night, chances are she'll still be in Picton when we head back to the ferry on Monday).

On the way we pulled up on the coast where the wind was blowing a gale, and came across a seal colony. We watched the seals as they set about yawning, blinking and flopping over the rocks and pebbles, and stared backm up at us. But soon it was time to head on into Kaikoura, with our planned Whale Watching session the next day.

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Remember that book I brought from England, left in Auckland, and bought again in Wellington? Turns out, the second half's all written in German.

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As you can see I'm a wee bit behind at the moment. I'll try and get some stuff about our escapades in Kaikoura and Hamner Springs in the next few days. And the photos are looking pretty damn good, so I'll try and get them up soon as well.

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*The fifth member of course being Timmy the Dog.

Taking Time Out in Wellington
Topic: Travel
Since arriving in Wellington on Sunday night, I feel I may have hit something resembling what could be interpreted as a proverbial wall, with regards to the number of sites viewed and activities taken part in. This may in part be to do with meeting up with Mr Gregory Hopton of Longmead Avenue fame (my former housemate), and Ms Caitlan Dula, also of Longmead Avenue fame (but never my housemate), but mainly because I'm knackered.

Dear Caitlan has been my guide for the past three days, due to Greg having to work for a living at the moment, but we have accomplished a tour round the Te Papa centre (Wellington's museum), which is much more interactive than the Auckland Museum, in that they have a load of games to play. We did also make it to the Botanical Gardens via Wellington's Cable Car, which to be honest struck me as being more of a train than a cable car, as not once did it leave the ground to be suspended hundreds of feet in the air.
Our time in the garden itself was short lived due to the heavens opening upon us.

Wellington itself is enclosed by a panorama of hillsides, making it a compact city, which can never become a sprawling metropolis. It also has a large number of electric buses, which run like the trams in Blackpool, as in the streets have large runs of cables criss crossing the skyline, which the buses run off via conductors attached to their roofs. Which means, should a bus ever make a sudden sharp turn and become detached from the cable runs, it would instantly grind to a halt.

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Off to the South Island tomorrw with Greg and Cait on the ferry, where we plan to do some wine tasting, whale watching, and maybe some Kayaking. Whether I'll be in a position to write an update in the next few days, I'm not too sure. Do they even have the Internet on the South Island? Do they have eletricity?

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Well wha'd'ya know, was in Wellington for less than 24 hours, and the first branch of Whitcoulls bookshop I pop into (more hopeful than anything else), what do I find, but a fresh new copy of Louise Wener's 'The Half Life of Stars'. Sure, it was more than double the price of the copy I brought from England and left in Wellington, but what the hell.

Must try not to lose this copy, at least, not until I've actually finished reading it anyway. Still, just think how my purchase may have increased Ms Wener's royalties abroad, by oohh, 0.00000001p I expect.

Slow Train To Wello
Now Playing: Inbetweener - Sleeper
Topic: Travel

My time in Auckland culminated in a half hour hike up Mount Eden (almost scuppered by a deluge of rain in the morning), the highest point in the City, and also a one time ferocious steaming volcano. Unlike the volcanoes you get in the movies (all craggy and molten), this one was more akin to a golf bunker with its fine and green lawns. Still, it would'v been a bugger to swing your golf ball out again.

Spent Sunday on a train bound for Wellington. The Overlander is a twelve hour journey travelling through rolling hills, mountainous ranges, and lush greenland. And the whole time, all I could think about was "oh sh**, I've gone and left my book back in Auckland".

To make matters worse, it was a damn good book, and I was only half way through reading it, and I was just getting to the really good bits. Plus, it was written by Louise Wener (The Secret Life of Stars), the ex-lead singer of '90s Britpop band Sleeper, and so the chances of me actually being able to track down another copy on my travels out here, are practically null.

Auckland Photos
Topic: Travel
Photos from the Auckland leg are online now at the predictably titled Auckland Photos.

Hi, I'm in Waiheke and I can't move for this sunshine, rolling hills, sandy beaches, awesome views.....
Now Playing: Nothing by Puppy Killer (see the gig review at the end)
And so I leave behind the bustling cosmopolitan streets of Auckland for the day, and set sail for the serene and peaceful setting of Waiheke Island, a mere 35 minute boat trip away from Auckland wharf.

I thought it wise that I join a tour group for this, and I even made some notes, so excuse me while I plagerise the tour guide's spiel, but here we go:

Waiheke is Maori for Cascading Water. The Island has a population of 8,000 permanent inhabitants, but in summer this can rise to a massive 30,000. 1,000 people from Auckland, commute to Waiheke daily, on the hourly ferry service. Waiheke's main industry is wine, and the island amasses a total of 40 vineyards, of which a bottle of wine has been known to have fetched $1,000,000 at auction. Other industries include olive groves, and the cultivating of Macademia Nuts.

Housing on Waiheke is expensive, and I mean, very. A small holiday apartment will set you back $0.25 million. You can get a three bedroom house for $2.7 million, or a four bedroom for $4 million. Or, if you're feeling really flush, the most expensive house on the island is $26 million, but then, it is the size of a hotel. So, it's no wonder that a large number of Waiheke's inhabitants are either artists, novelists, musicians, or work in the media industry.

However, to get around such hefty house prices, a number of inhabitants have their houses built on the mainland, and shipped over.

Waiheke has no water system. Water is collected from roofs, and stored in tanks. If a household were to run out of water in summer, they would need to order water in. A delivery would cost around $500. Similarly, there is no sewerage system, instead the Waiheke people use septic tanks.

Power to the island is provided by a large under water cable, fed from the mainland.

Entertainment in Waiheke is provided by a large drive-in cinema, 3 storey's high.

You got all that? phew.

Anyway, the tour guide deposited those who wished to stay further, in the island's main town, Oneroa. And, may I be first to recommend getting dinner at the Island Queen Cafe and Restaurant, which serves, wait for it.... Lamb Casserole.

I said Lamb Casserole!!!!

That's Lamb flamin' Casserole, on a bed of mash. Shame I couldn't finish it all, as the portion was huge, and I'd only had breakfast a few hours ago, but its situated at 124 Ocean View Rd, Oneroa.

Anyway, the weather was gorgeuous, the beaches were superb, and the views were awesome (damnit, used that word again). After a stroll along the beach and through the rolling hills, it was soon time to return to the mainland, and to check-out up and coming local band, the charmlingly titled Puppy Killer, who were playing a free gig in Auckland's hippest music store, Groovy Records, where Auckland's entire rock fraternity had appeared to have turned out en mass, to witness the city's favorite'd sons as they strive to break into the big time. And on this evidence, I doubt they have a hope in hell.

From the outset, the band look like they want to be Green Day, and the second guitarist/vocalist looks like he wishes he had been in EMF, then they appear to be trying to rip off half a dozen Ska bands. There are one or two flashes where you think they're actually going to start being good, but they quickly revert to type. It's pretty mundane stuff, to be honest, so don't expect to be hearing much of Puppy Killer back home.

Which probably means they'll be huge within six months...

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I neglected to mention that I'd found a greasy spoon that does all day breakfast, and Internet access for only a doller an hour (the cheapest in Auckland). So expect much clooging of arteries, oh yes...